Hope as a Pie Chart

7 Apr

I initially started this blog around two years ago, with the goal that I would write about my dates and encounters so that one day my future husband would look back on the posts and get to re-experience the beginning of our relationship all over again.  Like a silly rom com, with me as the main character and true love as the overarching theme. Gag.  There were two posts: one about the Fabio-esque recovering alcoholic I went on a date with and the other about the night I met Clark.  Summer 2009.  I fell into the twists and turns of a new relationship, we moved in, he moved to New York and asked me to come with, I stayed in Chicago and we broke up.  Never thought I could sum that puppy up in one sentence.

Anyway, I deleted the posts because, let’s be serious, it’s time for a redirection. Not to mention the general thought of Clark’s existence makes me go against my internal campaign, pleasantly titled Pretend He Was Never Born and Tell Anyone That Asks That He’s Gay Now.

In the aftermath of the relationship, I fell into the following stages of recovery:

1.  Seek Attention from Any Living Male (otherwise referred to as the end of Summer 2010)

2.  Extreme Over Confidence

3.  Set Ups from Any Willing Friend

4.  Bringing Back the Regulars

5.  Attempt at Online Dating

6.  Liking Someone Again and Then Getting Dumped x2

7.  Purchase of Cable TV/Complete Unwillingness to Leave Apartment at All

8.  Minor Return of Hope

9.  The Present

If my current standing on hope for finding “the one” vs. not finding “the one” was a pie chart, my amount of hopefulness towards the idea would be one small, anorexic sliver of pie.  About five calories worth of hope.

In lieu of this, I’ve revamped my blog so that I can comment, in writing, about all the guys I meet.  Most of it will be mockery, but I may end up liking a few of them.  Don’t hold your breath though – I’m not of your typical Midwestern mindset. I’m sarcastic and judgmental, probably intimidating and definitely a pusher.

The last year in dating was such a joke and spring/summer 2011 is set up to not disappoint.  I can’t even believe that some of these stories are actually real when I say them out loud.  They’re like little presents, graciously given to me to reiterate the fact that if we can’t laugh about these ridiculous moments in life, what’s the point?

So here it goes. Take it, leave it, love it, laugh at it, whatever.

xxxx

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One Response to “Hope as a Pie Chart”

  1. Jessica Elmore April 7, 2011 at 2:24 pm #

    YAY! Its finally up!! Well done ma’am!

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